First, always seek medical advice from your doctor or other qualified clinician. My goal is to provide you with things to ask your local support system. Every year thousands of people takes their life. During my time in the Army, I wanted to take my life. Only by the grace of God that I didn’t. When we leave someone behind, they go through a grieving process. Your counselor can help you through the complex and traumatic event.
With this in mind, I hope to help people like me to see the effect we can possibly have on our loved ones. According to my research grief after suicide is different. How? It can be sudden, sometimes violent after a struggle with mental illness. Your loved one may have to deal the police and answer questions. If you’re like me, I felt there was no way out, like a human time bomb. You may even feel there is no one listening. Jack Jordon, Ph.D, clinical psychologist and co-author of, (After Suicide Loss: Coping with Grief) may help you understand your loved one’s journey when they lose someone.
Those dear to us may relive thoughts in an effort to understand what happened. Survivors may develop PTSD along with other potential issues. For me, those things didn’t cross my mind. Not until I was at a convention where people talked of their experience of losing someone to suicide. Made me think.
Family and others may feel the stigma that goes with suicide. Unfortunately, this stigma can be powerful. Due to people lack knowledge on this issue. Survivors may find it hard to discuss death with others. Adults may choose to keep it a secret from those they know, children, or keep it to a limited amount of people. Just like those of us who have contemplated this, they will sometimes have the same kind of emotions. Anger, rejection and abandonment. What if questions may come to them. Was I not paying attention? What if I had done……(you fill in the blank).
Relationships and your loved one’s world may feel shattered. Those left behind may even find themselves suicidal. If you survived a loved one’s suicide, seek professional help. There are support groups for survivors. Research for places in your area. Therapist and counselors can help you make sense of that happened. If you feel you have unfinished issues with your relationship with the deceased, let them know. Also, things like dealing with others handling the same news would be good to discuss with the person.
You may feel stuck or unable to move forward. Discuss things like avoiding hallow reassurances, uncertainty, or any other emotions you’re feeling. Remember, you’re seeing them to get help. You may have a trusted family member or friend you can talk to.
