The following is from PositivePsychology.com. We tend to put others first. Neglecting ourselves almost to a default. My goal is to help other people who deal with mental health issues like me. Last year I got my VA claim accepted last year. I tried many things like cognitive behavior therapy. It was always hard to apply things. Constantly had to stop reading because my MST and PTSD would trigger just trying to read things to help me. Since last year I found that listening to meditation music works the best for me. So far I have been able to keep my thoughts and emotions from consuming my mind.
When we are in a difficult place it can be hard to focus on positive things. Self-talk can be in our thoughts not just verbally. Spend the next few days and try and notice when you are self-talking. Analyze it. Identify and if its negative try and reframe your thoughts or words. If you find yourself thinking I can never do the sewing pattern. Reframe and say I have not been able to do that sewing pattern yet but, with time and practice and support from my teacher I will develop the skills needed to do it and even more than that. Try and keep your positive self-talk in the for front. Immediately when something negative comes up, think how you can say or think it in a more positive way. It will take practice. Even when you don’t feel like it, try too anyway. We are creatures of habit. Let it become part of your daily life.
The information I found talks about three stages to self-talk:
- Preparation. When you’re about to come into a difficult situation say something like I only have to be here an hour, and I have plenty of people I can associate with while here. If you’re at work say when I go into the meeting, I am not going to worry about what Mary says. I talked to our boss, and he said he’ll handle the situation if it comes up again.
- Coping. Use positive statements. I will concentrate on the mindful meditation skills to direct my thoughts and emotions in a positive direction. I’ll take things one minute at a time, one day at a time, or whatever it takes.
- Review. Look back and give yourself credit when you find you were able to cope with “that.” Whatever that is. I’m proud that I was able to stop and think before I spoke, so I didn’t speak out of anger.
Here are some positive affirmations they mention:
I am responsible and in control of my life.
I am able to have better control over my thoughts and emotions.
I’m learning to be comfortable around people who I feel don’t understand me.
I accept that I will sometimes make mistakes. I know from other things I’ve done that over time and experience I was able to do another task that seemed difficult.
Instead of thinking Try thinking
Must I prefer
Can’t I choose not to
I can’t do that exercise I achieved a difficult exercise.
Create a positive self-talk/ coping thoughts worksheet. Do one where you put instead of thinking, try thinking, instead of saying, exchange it with: You shouldn’t do that and replace it with I prefer you not do that. Keep a positive data log. Example, 3/20, 2022 I was praised by my boss for the work I did on the message board I created.
